My Life. My Rules.

I might end up with a new car. My mom’s 2007 Ford Focus to be exact. I love my car, Abraham the Altima. He’s a 2001 Nissan Altima. I love it because I’m used to it, which is completely normal. The only problem is: he shakes when I drive it. The steering wheel shakes, the hood shakes, the seat sometimes shake too. Not that normal. I got it checked out, and the reasoning is this: I need a new catalytic converter. I don’t know what the fuck that is, but I know it costs $1,800. The mechanic says it’s not necessary now, but it will be soon enough. Well, I don’t know when “soon enough” is. And that scares me. To the point that I’m not entirely safe driving Abraham. I feel nervous when I drive him, sometimes. That’s never good. I love driving my mom’s car. Because it’s the shit. It’s better than my Altima. Probably because it’s new. I don’t even know how to explain it, I just feel better driving it. I feel bad if I do end up selling Abraham. It’s been less than 2 years. I love that car, but it’s 9 years old and I’m seriously afraid of it somehow breaking down on me. The check engine light is always on, and it’s always due to the fucked up catalytic converter. So, Honda City sold it to me with the check engine light turned off. I have to do the same thing.

I also need the bank to approve my parents loan. That’s what needs to happen for all this. The loan goes through; my parents lease a 2010 Honda Civic. It doesn’t go through; I’m stuck driving a car that I no longer feel 100% safe in.

Like I said though, I would love to have the Focus, but it would be hard to give Abraham away.

So I went onto the ABC Family website and went to the schedule for December to find the 25 Days of Christmas lineup. Here it is, with some complaints on the days where they never show Christmas shit. How does this get by? I will write angry letter after angry letter until they show a Christmas movie EVERY GODDAMN DAY.

Dec 1: Dr. Seuss’ How The Grinch Stole Christmas (alright starting off strong)

Dec 2: The Santa Clause (beautiful, Tim Allen at his finest)

Dec 3: The Polar Express (kinda shitty, but what can you do?)

Dec 4: All Day- Harry Potter Marathon…wait, did I read that right? Yes, I did. How the balls is this Christmas?

Same day: Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas (ok it sorta makes up for Harry Potter)

Dec 5: Harry Potter Marathon again (are you fucking kidding me? 2 days in a row of bullshit? Give me a break)

Dec 6: Rudolph the Rednosed Reindeer and the Island of Misfit Toys (not even the original, it’s the piece of crap one from 2001, but ok)

Same day: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (I can’t even complain, terrific movie, but come on)

Dec 7: Cranberry Christmas

Frosty’s Winter Wonderland

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (terrific, all of these are Christmas. Congratulations ABC Family. You did it!)

Dec 8: Miracle on 34th Street (shit, but christmas so good)

Dec 9: Rudolph’s Shiny New Year (this is the worst one out of all the Rudolph movies, but I guess it’s Christmas (really it’s New Year’s) but ok)

The Gruffalo (wtf is this?)

Santa Claus is Comin’ To Town (amazing)

The Year Without a Santa Claus (you bet your ass! Now just show this one everyday and I’m happy)

Dec 10: The Santa Clause (again? I guess after a week of showing 6 Christmas movies, you run out of material?)

Dec 11: Holiday Movie Marathon (sweet, now play this in front of Harry Potter because, you know, it involves Christmas and it’s you 25 Days of Christmas lineup)

Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (didn’t see it, but good. Christmas)

Dec 12: Christmas Cupid (fine)

Dec 13: Holiday in Handcuffs (sounds shitty, but it’s Christmas)

Dec 14: Dr. Seuss’ The Cat in the Hat (I….don’t….why?)

Dr. Seuss’ Pontoffel Pock, Where Are You? (What is happening?)

Dr. Seuss’ The Grinch Grinches the Cat in the Hat (When the hell was this made?)

Puff the Magic Dragon (What does this have to do with Christmas? I just looked it up. It’s about a boy’s pet dragon. Not one fucking Christmas theme)

Dec 15: Disney Prep & Landing (you can’t be serious)

Disney & Pixar’s Finding Nemo (What? The entire things underwater. Fish don’t celebrate Christmas)

Dec 16: Disney & Pixar’s The Incredibles (HOW DOES THIS INVOLVE CHRISTMAS)

Dec 17: Disney & Pixar’s Wall-E (this is a joke right? Robots don’t give a shit about Christmas, there isn’t a scene with it)

Dec 18: Holiday Classics Marathon (THANK YOU LORD JESUS CHRIST)

Disney & Pixar’s Toy Story (ok…this is one of my favorite movies. But I guess if it has a 1 minute scene where it’s Christmas, then it must be a Christmas movie? That explains Harry Potter and this…but nothing else)

Dec 19: Disney & Pixar’s Toy Story 2 (oh, come on! This one doesn’t have a Christmas scene. You’re slowly killing my inner child, ABC Family)

Dec 20: Santa Buddies (fine)

Dec 21: Miracle on 34th Street

The Polar Express (good. keep it this way)

Dec 22: The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (as long as it says Santa or Christmas in the title, I don’t care anymore)

Dec 23: Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (fantastic. But twice? You show Harry goddamn Potter twice (all 4 of them, I suppose), and you show Toy Story 1 and 2, neither one being a Christmas movie. Can you just show Home Alone 1? Let’s say that maybe, I’ve never seen the first one before. Now I’m going to be lost in the plot because you guys insist on playing Home Alone 2 twice)

Dec 24: Holiday Classics Marathon (thank god)

Dec 25: Dr Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas (it’s done, it’s finally done)

So, realistically, it is the 17 days of Christmas. Fine. Just show actual Christmas movies. That is all.

Been a while since I’ve even been on this thing. More posts coming soon. Probably….maybe….I’ll get around to it….fuck it, it’s not happening.